Some people are cat people. Some people are dog people. Bird, fish, reptile and other animal-type people abound as well. "Fur People" (as pets are known in many homes) have some great assets, just by nature of being our pets. They're usually home, even in the middle of the night. Substance abuse among the pet population is rare (catnip might be an exception). Unemployment is expected of them, and they love us unconditionally. Animal companions are good for us. Studies show that people with pets have lower blood pressure, live longer lives and suffer from less anxiety.
But for victims of domestic violence, pets can become a barrier to leaving an abusive relationship and can even become a tool of violence for an abusive partner who is willing to injure or kill a pet as a retaliation or as part of a pre-emptive strike designed to gain or maintain control by means of terrorism. The more you or your children are attached to a pet, the more that pet can be seen by an abuser as a means to control you. Pets are also often seen as being in competition with an abusive partner for your attention.
Even if a spouse has never been violent towards YOU, it's vital that you take even the threat of violence against a pet seriously - not only for the pet's safety, but for your own as well. Tons of research has been done on the issue of animal abuse and the relation to child abuse and spouse battering and the facts are in: threats or actions against your pet are a very strong indicator that violence is on the way for you or your children.
Of 50 shelters surveyed about women and children escaping from domestic violence, 85% said that women in their shelter talked about pet abuse, 63% of children talked about pet abuse, and 83% said that they had observed the coexistence of domestic violence and pet abuse. (See: "The Abuse of Animals and Domestic Violence: A National Survey of Shelters for Women Who Are Battered". By Frank R. Ascione, Ph.D, Claudia V. Weber, M.S., and David S. Wood, Utah State University, Logan, Utah. Society and Animals, 5(3): 205–218. 1997).
Further research indicates that 70% to 75% of women reporting domestic violence also reported that their partner had threatened and/or actually hurt or killed one or more of their pets. Actual (as distinct from threatened) harm to pets represented the majority (57%) of reports. (See: "Battered Women's Reports of Their Partners' and Their Children's Cruelty to Animals" By Frank R. Ascione, Ph.D, Utah State University, Logan, Utah. Originally published in Journal of Emotional Abuse, Vol. 1(1) 1998.)
Nearly half (46.4%) of the incidents involved the father, stepfather, or woman's boyfriend as the perpetrator. 93% of the children indicating they were "sort of upset " or "very upset" by the incidents. 50% of these children said they had protected pets, in some cases by directly intervening to keep pets from being harmed. (See: "Animal Welfare and Domestic Violence". By Frank R. Ascione, Ph.D, Claudia V. Weber, M.S., and David S. Wood, Utah State University, Logan, Utah. Originally submitted to The Geraldine R. Dodge Foundation, April 25, 1997.
If your partner harms your pet in any way, consider filing a police report. Not only can this result in criminal charges, but as part of the bigger picture it helps to build your case for a restraining order to protect yourself and the rest of the famly, establishes a paper trail on the trend of violence from the abusive partner, and can start the ball rolling for your state's crime victim compensation program to cover costs associated with an abuser's criminal action (remember to save all your vet bills). It also helps to establish a civil case against an abusive partner for intentional infliction of emotional distress should you decide to sue an abuser in civil court at a (much) later date.
Unfortunately, many victims stay in abusive relationships because they don't know what to do with their pets. Many victims, up to 25%, report that concern for their pets had affected their decisions about leaving or staying with the batterer. Higher proportions of rural than urban women reported that their partners had threatened or harmed their pets and that concern for their pets had affected their decisions. (See: "To Leave or to Stay? Battered Women's Concern for Vulnerable Pets" by Catherine A. Faver, Elizabeth B. Strand. Journal of Interpersonal Violence. Beverly Hills: Dec 2003.Vol.18, Iss. 12; pg. 1367).
Family, friends, or a local domestic violence safe house might welcome you and your children, but what do you do about Fluffy?
If you are thinking about leaving because of domestic violence but hesitating because you don't want to leave your pet behind, always call your local program and let them know the situation - it's not a unique one. Ask the program to help you find someone willing to house your pet. Many domestic violence programs work with local animal rescue programs or their local Humane Society to find safe and loving homes for your pet until you've made safer arrangements for yourself and your children. Just because you've never seen it advertised, don't assume that the help isn't available. You've got to ASK. Your safety and the safety of your pet depend on it!
Other things to do include: